What Bush Really Said, Ringo

From Kos Diaries:

Thanks to my state-of-the-art Bush Decoder Ring®, I was able to cut through the B.S. of today's inaugural address and tell you what he really told American and the world.

So it is the policy of the United States to seek and support the growth of democratic movements and institutions in every nation and culture, with the ultimate goal of ending tyranny in our world.

Translation: Iran and Syria, you're next.

My most solemn duty is to protect this nation and its people against further attacks and emerging threats. Some have unwisely chosen to test America's resolve, and have found it firm.

Translation: Iraq war: Got a problem with it?

We will persistently clarify the choice before every ruler and every nation: The moral choice between oppression, which is always wrong, and freedom, which is eternally right.

Translation: You're either with us or against us.

Wait! It gets better...

Keep reading if you want, but I think Bush really said this:

The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children.

And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you.

He's been sayin' this shit for years.  I never really questioned what it meant. I thought it was just a cold-blooded thing to say to a muthafucker 'fore he popped a cap in his ass. 

Now I'm thinkin', it could mean they're the evil men. And he's the righteous man. And Mr. .45 there, he's the shepherd protecting his righteous ass in the valley of darkness.

But that ain't it.

See, it could be they're the righteous men, and he's the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. I'd like that.

But the truth is they're the weak and he's the tyranny of evil men. But he's tryin'.  He's tryin' real hard to be a shepherd.

--Zap